The Story Behind...(I'll Drive Yesterday)

Track 6 on my latest project, So Human, is titled, "So, I had this dream..." It's a scene where I'm sitting down with my engineer/producer, Mike Manthei, and discussing the upcoming song. On the track, Mike and I are at a diner, talking about the title to track 7, "I'll Drive Yesterday." Now, there are some things you should know about this scene as it plays out on the CD. First, Mike and I were never at a diner. (Well, I mean we've had lunch together several times but this taping didn't take place at a diner.) Instead, we recorded the scene right there in the recording studio. I sat down on a stool, under the microphone, with Mikey (that's what I call him) sitting next to me. For a little more realism, I actually had a plate in front of me. On the plate was a slice of bread and a butter knife. I cut up the bread and ate it while we talked. The background noise you hear on the track was actually recorded a couple of weeks earlier--at my workplace. I sat a microphone and a small digital recorder out on a table in our cafeteria and just recorded people eating, talking, walking by. But the story I tell in the scene is true. The song really did come about as the result of a dream. Like I explain in track 6, I dreamed I was on stage in front of a massive crowd. My band began this chunky rock groove and I shouted in a pseudo-British/Australian/Cockney accent, "This song's called I'll Drive Yesterday!" And the crowd went nuts. They were screaming and yelling. But then I woke up. I didn't know how the song went. All I had was a title. Meanwhile, my guitarist, Brian DeKam, had written a cool guitar groove for another song that we ended up never using. But I really liked the music tracks. So I stole those music tracks and wrote the words to I'll Drive Yesterday to go with them. About the song: So I sat down and tried to figure out what the heck the words, I'll Drive Yesterday could possibly mean. And the only thing that I could come up with was God's promise...of taking those pains and sins of the past and throwing them away. Have you been lied to? Cheated on? Hurt? That was yesterday. God will drive it away. I also wanted to paint a picture of how holding on to past hurts can affect you:

"Yesterday's a prison. A room without a view.

A judge without a pardon and no remorse for you."

and contrast that with the hope that comes through Christ, who says:

" I'll Drive Yesterday all away and leave it all behind you

there'll be nothing to remind you of yesterday. It's gone today

and the pain and sorrow life put in your way, that was yesterday."

I think my favorite part of the song is the bridge. It has a bit of a "scat" feel to it and the message is, I think, important:

"All of the baggage, all of the scars

all of the wreckage left on your heart

you've gotta let go, it'll tear you apart

you've gotta give it away.

Ah man...that was yesterday."

So there you have it. Some truth. Some deception. But the real story behind the song whose title confuses so many folks upon hearing it the first time. Hope you enjoy!

The Story Behind...(Here I Am)

A lot of folks have been asking me about the meaning or story behind some of my songs. So, I thought I'd go through each of the songs on my new album, So Human, and give a little insight into my messed up head! Ha! At first, I thought I'd just go through the album, track by track, but instead I think I'll start with the song that gets the most questions--Here I Am. First off, let me say that it's always tricky to try to write a song from the perspective of Jesus. To presume that I could possibly speak for my Savior is a bit daunting. But I wanted to tell Christ's story--from His perspective. This song is really Jesus telling the story of His life. And it starts...in the womb. What must it have been like to go from being fully God, to being God in the form of a human baby? So the first lines, "what is this skin that covers me?" is Jesus examining this new flesh around His body. In the following verses, He talks about growing up as a child in a world of mortals. He mentions the miracles that He's performed. I admit, I threw in my own supposition in the second verse. I wondered how lonely our Savior must have felt. "Five thousand here, I'm still alone" He says, speaking of how different He must have felt. "Oh they gather how I feel, but not one asks how I feel--not ever." I wondered if anyone ever asked Jesus how difficult it was to be God on Earth. I don't recall any scripture that shows anyone displaying this kind of concern for Him. How terribly isolating that must have been! The chorus, "Here I am, I'm ready to be everything that you want me to be" means something different everytime. The first time, it's the baby Jesus talking to his earthly parents--Mary and Joseph. It's Him saying "Hey, I'm your baby. I'm your child. I'm ready to be all those things that parents want from their babies--the wonder, the excitement, the love, the reliance on you for my needs, etc." In the second chorus, Jesus is being arrested by the soldiers, to be taken off for execution. In this chorus, He's saying "You want me to be the scapegoat? I'll be that for you. Want me to bear the punishment that you so desperately want to give out? I'll do that for you." And in the final chorus, Jesus is on the cross, speaking to His Heavenly Father. "Here I am" He says, "I'm ready to be the fulfillment of your plan. I'm ready to take on the sins of this world for you, Father. I'll be what you need me to be." And finally, in the final verse, Jesus experiences something else for the first time. "What is this sin that covers me?" Here's a man that knew no sin, then suddenly found Himself covered in all the sins of humanity. Wow. I should also point out that the orchestration was done by a good friend of mine, John Doryk, with NightSky Sound Design. He's an amazing composer and added just the right touch to this song. So there you have it. That's the story/meaning behind Here I Am. Hope you understand it a little better...and enjoy it!